The lift reached its way to the very top of the WIPE building, opening up to the corridor that stood before the Director’s office, or the Hall of Operations Enhancement and Decision Making, as the rather long sign on the wall stated. The Commissioner led the way down the red carpet towards the baroque doors. Baroque? Is that right? Why not find out for yourselves? Make this an interactive learning experience!
Standing before the door was a large, beefy armed man dressed in a somewhat ill-fitting security guard costume. He held out a hand that could have been mistaken for a bunch of bananas, if it had been painted yellow and the observer was partially blind.
“Halt!” he cried. “No one gets to see the Director while she’s busy!”
“Come on, Hindle,” the Commissioner sighed. “It’s me, the Commissioner.”
“I don’t care if you’re the president! No one gets to see the Director while she’s busy!”
“But it’s me that she’s meant to be busy with! I’ve brought Abraham Lincoln to see her.”
Lincoln waved politely. The security guard gave him a long, hard stare.
“I heard you was dead,” he said after an awkwardly long silence.
“It doesn’t appear to have been serious,” Lincoln smiled. “Might I kindly ask, young sir, that you see fit to let us meet with your esteemed employer? I believe she is waiting on a meeting with our good selves, and as you know sir, it is ungentlemanly to keep a lady waiting.”
“I ain’t been given no orders to let anyone in! I was told not to let no one in until the Director says so!”
“I realise that sir, and naturally I find your dedication to your role commendable,” Lincoln tried turning on the old diplomatic charm that had helped him so often in the past. “However, as I’m sure you realise, your Director is waiting on us to see her, and so cannot continue to be busy unless we are on the other side of this door. So if you would kindly step aside and let us in, then she can be busy once more, and you can resume the door checking duty to which you are so good at.”
Murphy Hindle was a man of simple ideas, and so the stranger’s words confused him a little. He wished the man would go away so he could continue guarding the door. He liked guarding the door. It was a nice, easy task that a man could feel proud about doing. He didn’t want to get into arguments about why he should let people through-that was just muddying the issue. Maybe he should just let them by, and get back to the simple solitude of looking after the door.
But no. Orders was orders, and the Director hadn’t told him to let anyone in yet, so this tall bearded fellow wasn’t going to talk his way past him, nosiree
“No one gets to see the Director while she’s busy!” he shouted, a smile of satisfaction on his face as he gave that familiar phrase. He’d memorised it all by himself, and it gave him a sense of relief to say it.
Lincoln sighed, and rolled up his sleeve. “I don’t really want to get physical with you boy, but...”
Before he could finish, a bloodcurdling scream reverberated throughout the building.
“What was that?” asked Hindle, covering his ears.
“I don’t know,” Lincoln replied, “But I bet it was a high level security risk. The type that would guarantee a promotion to whoever went to investigate it. Why, if for example, a doorman went to check it out, they’d probably get promoted to Chief Door Retainer for their bravery alone!”
“You really think so?” said the doorman, his face aglow with excitement at the prospect.
“Only one way to find out,” Lincoln grinned, pointing to the elevator. Hindle nodded and ran to the lift, which closed around him, taking him down to the noise.
“Well that’s that,” Lincoln rolled down his sleeve. “But what do you suppose that screaming is, Commissioner?”
“Best guess? Probably Dynamite getting a face full of laser. Let’s go.”
The Commissioner opened the door, ushering the ex-president inside. Lincoln stepped into the room, where he found himself face-to-back with a tall, raven-haired lady.
“Ah, Mr. Lincoln. We’ve been expecting you.”
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