“An imposter? Me? What on Earth are you going on about?” the Director gave a slight smile.
“Dash and blazes Lincoln!” said the Commissioner, who was much better at showing indignation than the Director was. “What in the name of tasty sundried tomatoes are you babbling about? The Director, an imposter? Madness!”
“I assure you Commissioner, it’s no madness,” Lincoln began to pace up and down the room. “If you’ll indulge me, I’d like to bring up one or two little points that led me to this conclusion.”
“Fire away,” the Director took a seat. “It should be an amusing experience. Especially given that you’re accusing me of being an imposter, when you’ve hardly known me long enough to know what to look for.”
“Oh, don’t get me wrong, ma’am,” Lincoln shook his head. “I’m not accusing you of being an imposter of the Director. I’m accusing you of being an imposter…of a woman!”
“Damnation and hellfire, of course she’s a woman! Look at that womanliness. Femininity practically exudes from her. It’s…it’s…”
The Commissioner took a long, hard look at the Director, as if for the first time. “You know something, Mr. Lincoln? You might be onto something there.”
The Director frowned. “I hope you’re prepared to take a 5% pay cut for your misogynistic remarks, Commissioner.”
“I wouldn’t worry about losing any pay, my friend,” Abe put a reassuring hand on the crestfallen Commissioner’s shoulder. “After we’re done here, I doubt the Director here will be in a position to make decisions.”
“Half rhymes aside, Lincoln, what proof do you have that I’m not 100% woman?”
“Because I know who you really are, of course. But even if I didn’t, face facts. Your clothes aren’t coordinated. You’re wearing open toe shoes in a professional setting. You’re wearing too little foundation, and too much blush. You’re no more a woman than I am.”
“You seem to be the one holding all the fashion tips,” the Director sneered.
“True enough, sir,” Lincoln held the lapels of his suit. “However, as I said, I know who you really are. So why don’t you drop this charade and reveal yourself?”
“You can’t be serious, Lincoln! In here, with two men watching? Think of the scandal!”
“I wasn’t suggesting he disrobe, Commissioner. Rather, I was suggesting he stop this ridiculous pretence of being a woman and just admit who he is.”
“And who would that be, if you’re so sure,” the Director gave a nonchalant look.
“Someone I admit I only knew briefly in life, but in the short time that our paths crossed, it changed my life forever. Someone with the skills to pull off such a convincing act, and the motive necessary to commit to it in the first place. Someone who I certainly cannot allow to go any further, and who definitely shouldn’t be allowed to run free in a high level facility such as this.”
“Stop stalling man, and come out with it! Who do you mistakenly believe me to be?”
Lincoln pointed an accusatory finger. “Why, none other than my would-be assassin! John Wilkes Booth!”
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